


You'll be mine and I'll be yours

by mostlikelydefinentlymad



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: 1940s, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, Stucky - Freeform, dernier is a sweetie, post serum steve, right before the mountain scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-04-17 04:18:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4651968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mostlikelydefinentlymad/pseuds/mostlikelydefinentlymad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>you'll be mine and I'll be yours<br/>all I know since yesterday is everything has changed</p><p>"Steve curls his hand around Bucky's and squeezes harder than he used to be able to. There are a million things he wants to blurt out - things like 'I've always loved you and the idea of you dying makes me want to hurl myself over the nearest mountaintop so don't go and die on me, please' and 'Thank you for always believing in me when no one else did'   but they sound too final - more like a goodbye than a profession of love."</p>
            </blockquote>





	You'll be mine and I'll be yours

"My nose isn't that big," Bucky protests even as he laughs and points at Steve's drawing. They're in Italy with bombs dropping like leaves from trees all around them and the threat of death hangs thick in the air but they're _together._

"I drew it as I saw it," Steve defends with a grin on his face. He'd sketched Bucky as they sat at the bar the previous night - all glassy eyes with dark hair spilling over his forehead, uniform loosely hanging on his frame as he grips his drink tightly and gives Steve a lazy smile. He was so damn beautiful that it was impossible to not draw him - after all Steve already had his pencil and paper out because they'd been coming up with new designs for his suit despite Bucky protesting ("Aw come on, the tights aren't so bad"). 

Dernier mumbles something in french and points to Bucky's eyes in the drawing.

"You know we can't understand you," Dum Dum says as he shakes his head.

Gabe converses with him for a moment before replying "He says your eyes look sad."

Steve held the drawing closer - he was right. Bucky was smiling in the drawing but his eyes told another story.

"I was jus' tired is all," Bucky explains with a shrug.

Steve wants to tell him that he should've hung back and recovered but it would only hurt Bucky's pride. He certainly wouldn't have agreed to Steve running off without him especially after the passionate "NO! NOT WITHOUT YOU!" at the Hydra base. He'd never saw Bucky so intense in all their life.

"That's 'cause you never sleep. This one time he stayed awake for 14hrs straight," Steve nudges Bucky's elbow with his own and it makes him smile - anything to wipe away the worried look on his face that he's desperately trying to hide.

"How was I 'sposed to sleep with your snoring?," Bucky teases.

"I got a girl back home waitin' for me and she snores like a log but I sure do love her," Gabe adds.

Bucky nods with a small smile - despite his complaining he'd give anything to be back in Brooklyn with Steve's loud snoring keeping him up at night and the truth was - he'd stayed up that late because he was afraid he'd oversleep and miss work. They couldn't afford for that to happen again - he'd get fired. And love? Oh how he loved Steve Rogers. He'd loved him from the very start but that's the kind of love that you hide and don't ever let it see the light of day. Sure they both knew that men who loved other men existed and it was a dangerous life but the risk of losing Steve was too high and so he'd tugged him along on one double date after another and spent the entire time looking over his shoulder at Steve who sat around moping and watching him dance. He'd always end the night with a half hearted apology - he was sorry that Steve hadn't enjoyed himself but secretly relieved that no one had taken him away.

"What about you Cap? Got a girl back home waitin' on you?," Falsworth asks as he reaches for the drawing.

Steve blushes and grins - looks down at his feet like he always did when Bucky would compliment his sketches.

"Nah, there's no one back home waiting on me. Just got Buck here," he pats Bucky's arm through his thick navy blue pea coat and looks away before adding "Got my eye on someone though. Not sure if she likes me or not."

Bucky stiffens beside of him as Falsworth passes him the drawing and without asking if he can keep it or not he folds it carefully and tucks it inside of his coat.

"That ones a looker," Morita comments. Of course they know who Steve is referring to, it's impossible not to. 

"Yeah she is," Steve pulls out a compass with her picture inside and grins as he shows the others. They raise their eyebrows and whistle. He turns to Bucky who just nods his head and looks the other way.

"I had a girl before I shipped out. Knew her our whole lives and she was somethin' special but she couldn't handle me leavin'. I mean I never got around to making it official but if we make it out of here alive I'm going to," Dum Dum says with a sigh.

Steve closes the compass and slips it back into a compartment on his belt. Bucky can relate and damn if he didn't wait too late.

"What about you Barnes?," Gabe asks and all eyes turn to Bucky.

He shakes his head and is careful to avoid Steve's eyes, "I'm too busy for that."  Had it been any other time or place and he didn't feel bone tired and hungry he would've made a joke about it. He didn't have the energy to even try right now.  

The others begin to share stories about their lives back home - before the war, interrupting one another and doing their best to quietly whisper but Steve is silent as he studies Bucky's face. They're right - he's not happy and it shows. He's never been able to hide his emotions and they always reflect in his eyes.

"What's wrong?" Steve nudges him with his elbow and Bucky keeps his eyes focused on a twig near his foot. There is silence on the front for the moment (no sharp blasts of gunfire or explosions) as the other men talk.

"If you're worried about having a girl we'll find you one, promise."

Bucky forces himself to not react - to keep a neutral expression on his face. Steve cannot know - he will take this secret to his death and for that matter there's no privacy in the trenches. He's heard the words men like him are called - "tinkerbelle" "fairy" and the like. It isn't like he doesn't like girls - he does but Steve is a whole 'nother matter. Steve is it for him. He's _home._

"I'm not worried. Never had any problem getting them back at home."  The words come out more harsh than he'd intended - a product of setting fire to his feelings and watching as they dwindle to ashes because the only person hes ever loved now wants someone else and it took him too long to realize that that day might come sooner rather than later. 

"Okay. I was just wondering," Steve replies mostly to himself. 

" 'sides why do I need a girl when I got you right here?," he gives Steve his most charming grin and a wink. That's not overstepping boundaries is it? At this point the line is a blur and he could be stepping right over and wouldn't even know it.

Steve tilts his head to the side and gives him that look again - the one that makes Bucky ache on the inside.

 

Dernier watches the two of them as the others continue to chatter - now having moved onto who has the better shot at the furthest distance. They're sitting as close as they possibly can with shoulders pressed together - Bucky meeting Steve's eyes with a lazy glazed expression that Dernier has only shared with a woman. He thinks about it - Steve had swooped in on a one man mission and freed them all but Bucky had been his top priority - that was a given and he'd carefully dragged him from the exploding building with an arm around his waist and another resting on Bucky's stomach like he might just disappear if he wasn't touching him. And it hadn't stopped there. They'd spent the entire night at the bar huddled up together - leaning in close to whisper now and again with Steve only breaking away long enough to ask if he and the others would rejoin them to take down Hydra. Where one went, the other was right behind him. Then there was the matter of the sketch itself with every crease and detail in place - all the way down to the expression in Bucky's eyes - the same one hes wearing right now. This was the product of an artist who knew his subject probably better than he knew himself. He hadn't missed the quick flick of Bucky's eyes from Steve's when Peggy had been mentioned and how he'd gripped his weapon tighter. These two were something special whether they knew it or not and the presence of a woman in their lives wouldn't change a thing - they were in love. Even if they spoke his language he wouldn't out them - Steve had saved his life and he owed him this much at least.

"Falsworth here says he has the best shot. I disagree - I can take a man down from a mile away. What do you think Cap?," Morita interrupts their staring and Steve has to ask him to repeat the question.

"I'd say that Buck here has you all beat," he raises an eyebrow and pats Bucky's arm.

Bucky smirks - he may be losing Steve but at least he still believes in him.

"Aw come on now, you're just saying that because hes your buddy," Falsworth protests. Dernier elbows him in the ribs and when he turns as if to ask him why, he shrugs.

"Alright boys, time to move out. That train is gonna be passing soon and we have to be on it," Steve puts on his best game face and takes in his men - they're bundled up as tightly as possible and carry all their weapons on their bodies and he has nothing but respect for every last one of them. He's proud to call them his team.

"You all march up the North side and keep an eye out. I'll be right there," he orders. The snow crunches under their boots and fades as they walk away - Bucky stands to follow them but Steve puts a hand on his chest.

"Buck you gotta tell me whats wrong. I don't wanna die wondering what was bothering you."

"Steve, you're not going to die. I told you that - I won't let you," Bucky looks at him with sharp determined eyes that say he means every word.

"Is it Peggy? 'Cause if you don't like her I'll-," Steve began but was cut off by a stern look.

"It aint Peggy okay? If she makes you happy then go for it," Bucky is lying right through his teeth and he knows it - he shifts and does his best to avoid Steve's eyes.

"Then what is it?," Steve demands. It's like pulling teeth getting Bucky to spit it out.

"It's you!," Bucky didn't mean to throw the words at Steve - honestly. Hes having issues keeping his emotions in check whereas before the war he'd been able to hide everything. They really messed with his head and he doesn't know exactly what they did but it wasn't good and everything was amplified until his skin ached to touch Steve. It was all he could do to grip the gun hard in his hand.

Steve reacts as if hes just been slapped - they'd been happy...

"We should go," Bucky grumbles but makes no move to stand.

"No. Bucky Barnes I don't care if we die right here we'll die together but I refuse to go without knowing whats going on in that head of yours."  Steve has a stubborn expression and he isn't backing down - it's pointless to even try to fight.

"You'd die for me? I mean... _with_ me?"

"Both," Steve replies without hesitation.

Bucky crinkles up his forehead and rubs his eyes with the heel of his hands. He's exhausted in every conceivable way but he recalls making a vow to Steve what seems like ages ago, to stay with him until death. He'd meant every word. If Steve got married and had a family he'd fade into the background but he wouldn't leave him - not ever.

"You're an idiot you know that?," he teases and wraps an arm around Steve's broad shoulders - they were once small enough to tuck under his armpit and now he can hardly get an arm around them. He misses their apartment and sharp shoulder blades with a knotted spine so bad that he feels guilty for wanting it back and greedy. He missed the days when he didn't have to share Steve with anyone else.

Steve leans into the embrace and props his head up against Bucky's chest - his helmet is still firmly strapped to his head and Bucky wishes, for only a moment, that he could pull it off and ruffle those blonde locks like he once did.

"We should go," Bucky repeats - breaking the silence but Steve doesn't budge.

"We're going to - give me a minute okay?" Steve curls his hand around Bucky's and squeezes harder than he used to be able to. There are a million things he wants to blurt out - things like _'I've always loved you and the idea of you dying makes me want to hurl myself over the nearest mountaintop so don't go and die on me, please'_ and _'Thank you for always believing in me when no one else did'_ but they sound too final - more like a goodbye than a profession of love.

Instead he leans up and presses a light kiss right beside of Bucky's mouth and resists the urge to do more than that. He has Peggy now - someone who could love him like that without restraint, without him having to second guess how shes feeling. She's like a more open and feminine version of Bucky, all courage and confidence. 

On instinct Bucky turns just as Steve's lips touch his skin and accidentally capture his mouth. It's warm and soft under his own and Steve doesn't jerk away and protest - instead he pushes into the kiss and angles his head so that he can deepen it and slides his tongue against Bucky's - the cold doesn't matter anymore, not when Steve is heating every inch of his body. He tastes like peppermint and _Steve._ The kiss is long and deep - soft and passionate and says all the things they never could. Steve breaks away and is breathing hard as he says "I don't...I don't wanna stop but they're gonna think we're dead if we don't catch up." 

Dernier trudges back to check on them and sees them with arms tangled around one another and foreheads pressed together - he tries to escape but the heavy snow and the crunching of his boots give him away. They instantly separate and regard him with pink cheeks and red lips, eyes wide with shock. Before they can speak Dernier presses a finger to his lips to signify that he isn't telling anyone - he throws Steve a wink and walks away.

"He won't say anything will he?," Steve questions. His blue eyes are big and glittering with pupils wide - if a person were really paying attention they'd see right through him. He touches a finger to his bottom lip and Bucky bites back a groan.

"Hes a good guy, won't tell a soul," Bucky replies hoarsely as his eyes catch onto Steve's mouth.

"Okay. Okay that's...that's fine. Lets get going - they need us," Steve stammers.

Bucky followed behind him, one after another as they always were. They climbed to the side of the snowy mountain and Dum Dum gave Bucky an odd look. "Did you two get lost?"

Dernier breaks in and Gabe translates, "He says they were calibrating Steve's compass."  

That's one way of putting it. It works.

Steve grins at Bucky who smiles back before falling in alongside the other men as Steve overlooks the zipline for the train.

Bucky allows himself to hope that maybe, just maybe, things are looking up.

**Author's Note:**

> based on the picture of Steve and Bucky looking at a piece of paper while in the trenches http://stepchildofthesun.tumblr.com/post/84836506410/thewinterbirdie-captain-america-memorial-from 
> 
> Bucky went from being depressed at the bar to being worried but happy the next day - I figured something must've happened. title based on "everything has changed" by taylor swift.


End file.
